Bubbly

Listening to: The “Garden State” soundtrack
Thinking about: My upcoming weekend in Minneapolis, heat & material balances, Christmas-related stuff (yeah, you heard me), and when I’ll have to get an oil change.

Eating: Lunch


I remember the first time someone called me bubbly.

(Ashli and Bri just started giggling. They were there.)

It was my junior year of college in Tech Comm 2 and my professor was commenting on my speech. And for one reason or another (probably because I was), she described me as bubbly. Which, considering I was giving a speech, was something of a compliment.

I was a little surprised. I’ve been called a lot of things – sarcastic, dry, quiet – but until then, never bubbly. Granted for most of my life prior to then, if you had called me bubbly it was probably because you were hallucinating. It wasn’t until college that I ever gave a hint of bubbly.

I was also a little insulted, possibly because I associated “bubbly” with “airhead” and that just wasn’t going to fly. Once I realized she just meant I was upbeat and comfortable, I was okay, but it took a bit.

Then came the realization that I definitely had “bubbly moments” in select surroundings and company. But I’d rather not talk about those.

Now, I’m just ... content. While I still have my moments, I’m generally calm and quiet. Which is probably good, because when I get bubbly I also get overly energetic, and no one here really needs to experience that particular form of Ashley. Besides, she’s not terribly productive. Not a good thing for the work environment. (For me or those around me.)

The only reason this even came to mind is that, outside of work where Bubbly Ashley should stay quiet, I haven’t been feeling much like myself lately. I’ve been feeling ... subdued. Distant. I’d even say “repressed” if there weren’t so many extra connotations with the word.

This is a recent realization. I’ve been uncomfortable, and while I don’t think I’ve changed, I think certain aspects of me have gone into hiding. Some days I just don’t feel very me-like at all. Maybe a healthy dose of Bubbly Ashley would help.

Could be fun. (Heh heh heh heh ...)

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