All Growed Up
There have been some things on my mind lately: summer jobs, the health of my friends, classes, tests, and so on. But one thing keeps popping up, over and over again: "So THIS is what it's like to grow up."
The thing is, I don't feel grown up. I still like to play in the rain, go sledding, curl up and watch a Disney movie. I still enjoy playing with toys at Toys 'R Us. I still want to call my mom every time something goes wrong and let her fix it.
But, as time goes on, I find myself suppressing some of those urges--especially calling my mom because I got a boo-boo. It's just not dignified.
We let loose from time to time, sure. We like to play. We like to goof off. However, we're all coming to the general conclusion that you can't do that all the time. We still have to go to class, do laundry, go grocery shopping ... We can play, but we have to be adults every now and then. We have to take responsibility for our own lives.
This seems to be where a lot of people run into trouble--this little thing called "personal responsibility." A person could go nuts dealing with people who can't take care of themselves.
The first and most major issue kids hit when they go to college is money; if you were collecting a quarter for every person that called home asking for help, your laundry would be covered for a full year. No one's prepared for the weekly expenses, even the ones everybody tells them about. After buying books, most people don't know what to do with themselves.
The second biggest problem that freshmen face tends to be the sudden freedom most of them enjoy. This is usually where you hit the true stigma of college: drinking.
A quick disclaimer: this isn't a problem everybody has. HOWEVER, those who do have a problem tend to have a big one. A student here at Tech died because of it, and he was a sophomore. It's not just freshmen. Granted, it's largely freshmen, but it's not only freshmen.
Why does this happen? Well, there's the freedom thing, and a lot of people like to blame peer pressure (especially slightly disillusioned parents). For some, it's the "danger" factor, the slightly twisted rush people get by doing something illegal and drinking underaged. But for most, it's the fact that there aren't enough people holding them accountable. After all, if you don't have to answer to anyone, then you can do whatever you want, right? This little bit of interesting logic just proves the immaturity of such excessive actions.
On a less serious note, let's not forget about truly juvenile behavior. By "juvenile" I don't mean messing around when time allows; everybody needs to let off steam, especially when you're under pressure. By "juvenile," I'm referring to sub-par relationship behavior--that is, how your actions affect those around you. This is what we like to call "high school behavior." Stupid bets, self-involvement, ignorance, denial. Treating others as less than human, like their opinions and feelings are unimportant. These actions, unfortunately, are present at all age levels of humanity, but further prove the immaturity of people.
While I'm speaking of relationship behavior, I've seen one particularly interesting example. Girl goes out with a guy, decides she doesn't really want to anymore, cheats on him, then claims she "needs more time for classes. Let's just be friends." This wouldn't be complete, however, unless she gave him the silent treatment after this. After all, he makes her NEW boyfriend nervous.
Riiiiight.
Then, we can get into problems faced specifically by college students. For instance, it's infinitely easier for a rather exhausted student to sleep through that first class than it is to get out of bed and go. I'll admit to being guilty of that. Furthermore, why bother with homework if it's not actually corrected? (Oh, and that. And getting too bored with a class to do the homework that IS corrected.)
Fine, whatever. You paid for the class. Do what you want. When you fail, take responsibility for it. Don't blame the professor. It's simple, really, and the first step in losing the curse of immaturity.
There are other, little forms of immaturity. Refusing to accept that things have changed and not moving on (okay, so that's a big one, but I don't have much more to say about it). Or how about an unwillingness to ask for help, be it physical, mental, or emotional? (Yup, guilty of that one too. Stupid homework.) Spontaneous profanity--why is it considered common for college students to swear a blue streak? I don't understand that one. Lewd behavior, same thing. And the most common form of immaturity in all age groups, gossip (which, as any small town kid can attest to, is a curse where there aren't many people, including small schools). I had a friend who was a huge perpetrator of this particular one--key word being "had" a friend.
Of course, there's the other side to all of this; even here, there are those who are in too big of a hurry to grow up to enjoy themselves. Those who try to finish in three years, who get engaged (or pregnant), who rush things so they can get on with their lives. Those who scorn the people who are willing to have fun while they work through school. These things seem rather contradictory, but how mature is someone who is unwilling to admit that they're still young enough to enjoy things like sledding and playing with toys? Even my mother enjoys these things, probably even my granddad.
I'm not sure what my conclusion is. It's more commentary than fact. The thing is, I find myself surrounded by immaturity every single day, and some levels of it get to me. I'm not perfect. I'm a culprit just as much as everyone else.
I don't think you can really know how heavy something is until it has fallen on you.
- LeMel Hebert-Williams
The thing is, I don't feel grown up. I still like to play in the rain, go sledding, curl up and watch a Disney movie. I still enjoy playing with toys at Toys 'R Us. I still want to call my mom every time something goes wrong and let her fix it.
But, as time goes on, I find myself suppressing some of those urges--especially calling my mom because I got a boo-boo. It's just not dignified.
We let loose from time to time, sure. We like to play. We like to goof off. However, we're all coming to the general conclusion that you can't do that all the time. We still have to go to class, do laundry, go grocery shopping ... We can play, but we have to be adults every now and then. We have to take responsibility for our own lives.
This seems to be where a lot of people run into trouble--this little thing called "personal responsibility." A person could go nuts dealing with people who can't take care of themselves.
The first and most major issue kids hit when they go to college is money; if you were collecting a quarter for every person that called home asking for help, your laundry would be covered for a full year. No one's prepared for the weekly expenses, even the ones everybody tells them about. After buying books, most people don't know what to do with themselves.
The second biggest problem that freshmen face tends to be the sudden freedom most of them enjoy. This is usually where you hit the true stigma of college: drinking.
A quick disclaimer: this isn't a problem everybody has. HOWEVER, those who do have a problem tend to have a big one. A student here at Tech died because of it, and he was a sophomore. It's not just freshmen. Granted, it's largely freshmen, but it's not only freshmen.
Why does this happen? Well, there's the freedom thing, and a lot of people like to blame peer pressure (especially slightly disillusioned parents). For some, it's the "danger" factor, the slightly twisted rush people get by doing something illegal and drinking underaged. But for most, it's the fact that there aren't enough people holding them accountable. After all, if you don't have to answer to anyone, then you can do whatever you want, right? This little bit of interesting logic just proves the immaturity of such excessive actions.
On a less serious note, let's not forget about truly juvenile behavior. By "juvenile" I don't mean messing around when time allows; everybody needs to let off steam, especially when you're under pressure. By "juvenile," I'm referring to sub-par relationship behavior--that is, how your actions affect those around you. This is what we like to call "high school behavior." Stupid bets, self-involvement, ignorance, denial. Treating others as less than human, like their opinions and feelings are unimportant. These actions, unfortunately, are present at all age levels of humanity, but further prove the immaturity of people.
While I'm speaking of relationship behavior, I've seen one particularly interesting example. Girl goes out with a guy, decides she doesn't really want to anymore, cheats on him, then claims she "needs more time for classes. Let's just be friends." This wouldn't be complete, however, unless she gave him the silent treatment after this. After all, he makes her NEW boyfriend nervous.
Riiiiight.
Then, we can get into problems faced specifically by college students. For instance, it's infinitely easier for a rather exhausted student to sleep through that first class than it is to get out of bed and go. I'll admit to being guilty of that. Furthermore, why bother with homework if it's not actually corrected? (Oh, and that. And getting too bored with a class to do the homework that IS corrected.)
Fine, whatever. You paid for the class. Do what you want. When you fail, take responsibility for it. Don't blame the professor. It's simple, really, and the first step in losing the curse of immaturity.
There are other, little forms of immaturity. Refusing to accept that things have changed and not moving on (okay, so that's a big one, but I don't have much more to say about it). Or how about an unwillingness to ask for help, be it physical, mental, or emotional? (Yup, guilty of that one too. Stupid homework.) Spontaneous profanity--why is it considered common for college students to swear a blue streak? I don't understand that one. Lewd behavior, same thing. And the most common form of immaturity in all age groups, gossip (which, as any small town kid can attest to, is a curse where there aren't many people, including small schools). I had a friend who was a huge perpetrator of this particular one--key word being "had" a friend.
Of course, there's the other side to all of this; even here, there are those who are in too big of a hurry to grow up to enjoy themselves. Those who try to finish in three years, who get engaged (or pregnant), who rush things so they can get on with their lives. Those who scorn the people who are willing to have fun while they work through school. These things seem rather contradictory, but how mature is someone who is unwilling to admit that they're still young enough to enjoy things like sledding and playing with toys? Even my mother enjoys these things, probably even my granddad.
I'm not sure what my conclusion is. It's more commentary than fact. The thing is, I find myself surrounded by immaturity every single day, and some levels of it get to me. I'm not perfect. I'm a culprit just as much as everyone else.
I don't think you can really know how heavy something is until it has fallen on you.
- LeMel Hebert-Williams
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